Sitting here right now looking back, I feel as though the past 12 months don't belong to me. My encounter with cancer & the horrific things I have been told by the medical profession feels so far removed from my actual reality.
12 months ago to this day I was iagnosed with an invasive breast cancer, one that has a poorer prognosis than other types of breast cancer. It was no surprise when I was told I would need chemotherapy, radiation, and surgery as my "treatment".
If you've been following me for some time, you will know I decided to forge a path of my own. If you are new to my story, you can read all about my journey in detail HERE, HERE, HERE & HERE (yes, I have a lot to say).
Less than 6 months after my initial surgeries, the cancer returned. This time there were two new lumps. I decided to go ahead with another lumpectomy, but once again my margins (like last time) were not clear. Whilst the lumps themselves had been removed, I still had cancer cells left in my breast tissue.
This was scary news to hear because another surgery (to clean up the margins) was no longer an option. I was running out of breast tissue in that particular area, given I had already had three surgeries in the exact same spot.
I knew in that moment, conventional medicine no longer had anything more to offer me. Nothing I was willing to accept.
I walked out of that appointment being told that if I refused further treatment (mastectomy, chemotherapy & radiation) I would most likely not be here in 12 months.
And I never went back.
So where am I right now in my journey?
I can't speak for the future (but neither can you!) however right now, in this moment of time, all is truly well in my world. I simply live with cancer. Yes, it's there but it doesn't consume me or my life. I am busy living life.
Cancer for me has been a journey of emotional and physiological challenges rather than any physical ones. If you saw me in the street, you would be none the wiser. There is nothing about me that says "cancer".
Right now, with everything I am doing, I can't say I am cancer-free but what I can say is this:
I live with cancer and I am thriving.
Whilst the active healing process never actually stops, life right now looks really normal.
My weeks aren't consumed with appointments of any kind, I don't spend my days chronically researching cancer and to be honest, whilst it's always "there", my thoughts are not preoccupied with fear or anxiety.
I juice, I do my daily coffee enema, I take loads of supplements & superfoods, I eat an incredibly nourishing diet, I drink ozonated water, I meditate, do yoga, breathe work & sound therapy. I am working on my soul wounds, emotional triggers, my mindset, and beliefs that may have contributed to this "imbalance" we call cancer. I surround myself with beautiful supportive humans (& my poochies) & fill my days doing what lights me up. Time in the veggie patch, barefoot walks down by the beach & of course, my new business endeavor "Just B Pottery".
These are things we could all be doing for our bodies, our souls & our emotional wellbeing, regardless of cancer.
Right now I feel at peace with where I am on my cancer journey. I have gathered a lot of information along the way to enable me to make empowered choices, and I continue to stand strong by these decisions.
I recently had a (well-meaning) doctor very bluntly question me on these choices. He asked me if I was willing to die? Because of the path I had chosen...
F*ck no, I am not willing to die. BUT, neither am I willing to have my body poisoned, burnt, or mutilated by the medical system. I am, however, willing to support, nourish, empower & educate myself so that I can truly heal. And if this really was to be "my time" (which I don't believe it is) I choose quality over quantity.
In saying that, I am not walking down this path in blind faith. What I choose or do not choose is heart-felt but also very importantly it is evidence-based. I do my homework! I do not walk around affirming my body is healthy, sprinkling it with fairy dust and crossing my fingers.
I continue to observe my body very carefully. Apart from my day-to-day healing protocol, here is what I am doing to monitor my progress at the moment.
Live Blood Analysis
As my naturopath says, blood doesn’t lie! My blood repeatedly shows no sign of inflammation, toxicity, bacteria, or parasites. It shows a healthy & normal level of immune function (white blood cells). My bouncy, free flowing, evenly shaped blood cells continue to blow my naturopath away. My blood is in fact healthier than most people without cancer...
One of the most pivotal but controversial treatments I have used & continue to use right now is 'black salve'. In short, the salve causes cancer cells to die without affecting healthy cells and is often referred to as "herbal chemo". Black salve is used to physically draw out cancer/cancerous cells from the body. The process is incredibly intense, painful, and graphic. Every time I salve and get a reaction, I know I am closer to clearing out my body of any remaining cancerous cells.
I will dedicate an entire blog post about my experience with this incredible salve in the coming weeks. I truly believe that this powerful & natural salve is a potential lifesaver.
Thermography is a non-invasive (no radiation, no discomfort & no compression) test that is used to detect heat patterns within the body. Inflammation, infection & unusual vascularity (suspicious blood vessels which could be fuelling cancer growth) can all be seen via abnormal heat patterns.
At this stage, at the time of writing this post, I am waiting to have my follow-up 3-month scan. I am all about gathering as much information as I can, in the least invasive way. Thermography is a helpful diagnostic tool that holds a lot of valuable information.
Self-examination is important. I regularly check for any lumps or bumps in my breasts and armpits. I do currently have a couple of lumps in my armpit, however without doing a biopsy (which I refuse to do given what I now know about them) I have reasons to believe they are simply enlarged lymph nodes.
How I feel on a physical level is also incredibly important. I feel super vibrant, alive, happy, energised, strong, fit, motivated, inspired, and healthy (I don't imagine someone who is dying would feel this way...)
I have been very fortunate to be worked on by a very skilled, experienced & knowledgeable lymphatic drainage practitioner. The feedback I get from him about my lymphatic system is very encouraging.
After my first set of surgeries, I actually lost a range of movement in my right arm. One session with this amazing man and I had full movement back.
Whilst this may sound a little "woo-woo" to some of you, I also work with vibrational sound therapy and energy medicine. Without going into too much detail (as I don't understand it entirely myself) my practitioner works on the physics of the Universe using a laser pulse test & audio music. He has been able to identify cancer only within my right breast (but nowhere else in my energy channels) and is working to "turn" off these cancer signals within my body.
Whilst these may not be "mainstream" scans or tests they are still valid, and offer valuable information. As I mentioned above, blood does not lie, these results can not be dismissed. If I didn't feel good, my blood was showing signs of inflammation, and my lymph was thick and built up then that would be a different story. But right now, that is not my story.
So that is where I am right now in my cancer journey! I honestly can't believe it has been 12 months since my initial diagnosis but I am so grateful to be able to stand here today feeling even stronger, more proud & healthier because of this journey.
Thank you for following along!